G-Day’s this weekend, and the team has been conditioning and preparing for this scrimmage since mat drills back in February. Fans have a job to do too though – over-analyzing everything that happens in order to make definitive conclusions about where the team is headed this year. The highlight of course is the Johnny Brown / Ronnie Powell Award for an outstanding G-Day performance by a running back who’ll hardly ever see time in the fall. But every stat is fodder for our expert analysis, and none is too meaningless to scrutinize.

To get us warmed up, we’ll start with QB Joe Cox’s line from last Saturday’s scrimmage. It doesn’t matter that you didn’t watch the scrimmage; why confuse things when we have rock-solid stats?

6-of-18 for 65 yards. 1 INT, 2 TDs

If your reaction is to think, “well…just one scrimmage, controlled situations, coaches didn’t seem too concerned,” you’ve got a lot of work to do between now and Saturday. Consider these alternative and far more interesting and inflammatory reactions:

Good: Defense is back! If our starter can’t complete 50%, we must finally have something cooking in the secondary. Look out Teeblow!

Better: 33%? Cory Phillips was a better quarterback than that. Hell…Terrence Edwards was too! We’re in deep trouble if this is the best we have.

Now consider the stats for Aaron Murray (6-of-10, 132 yards, 2 TDs) and Logan Gray (7-of-9, 1 TD), and you come up with Best: QUARTERBACK CONTROVERSY!!!!11!